Monday, March 24, 2008

Magic Moments Monday

Okay, no logo yet. That week off just wasn't long enough. Maybe by next Monday?

At any rate, here are the guidelines for those of you who haven't visited before:
Mondays, for most people, are the "Ho hum, weekend's over, work is WORK, and can't wait 'til Friday" type of day. My intent is to help us begin our week with something positive, something to hold on to, to get us through the rest of the week. Your entry can be a Scripture verse, a quote, an insight, something that touched your life or changed the way you look at things. I expect some of the first entries to be from the past, until we learn to look each day for those magic moments that remind us how wonderful life really is.

Please leave a comment with a way to find your post, either the link through your signature, or insert the link, so we can all read your experience. Then, on your post, link back to this post, so others visiting you can participate if they'd like.
Okay? Okay, let's go.

Back in 1971, I graduated nursing school one weekend, took state boards the next, and got married the next--and started work within 2 weeks of the wedding. I was 20, very much in love, and probably really DID glow. I know my new wedding ring did.

An elderly patient of mine grabbed my hand one night to look at my ring. "My, my," she said. "This is very pretty. You haven't been married long, have you?"

"No, ma'am," I told her. "Just a few months."

"Well," she said, "I hope you don't mind if an old lady gives you some advice on marriage."

Not that I thought I needed any (oh, the arrogance of the young), but I was polite. "No, ma'am."

"Learn his ways," she told me. "Learn his ways."

I pretty much brushed that off; after all, it was the 70's, and though I wasn't a feminist, I didn't see why I had to learn HIS ways--why shouldn't he have to learn mine?

But you know, the older I've gotten, and the longer we've stayed married, the more valuable I realize her advice was. What says "I love you" more than knowing what makes him happy and doing it? Or knowing what makes him annoyed, or upset, and NOT doing it? Isn't communication just that--learning his ways? Learning how he acts when his back is really paining him, learning when he's joking and when he's serious, learning when to back off in an argument, learning that he has to mull things over a bit if I spring a new idea on him, learning to listen to his take on the candidates, (even though I hate discussing politics), learning what makes him laugh, and what makes him feel I value him--are these not the building blocks of a good marriage? And if I go to the effort to learn his ways, doesn't that make him want to learn mine?

I'm still working on it--learning his ways.

She was a very wise woman.


Your turn!

4 comments:

Pinky said...

loved this post. i'm learning, i'm learning.

Stephanie said...

Me, too. Hope I never stop.

Mommy Brain said...

This is such a sweet post. Thanks for sharing the magic with all of us.

MightyMom said...

it's up and running.