Buy Nothing

Sorry it's been so long since I wrote a post--where does the time go? I can't believe it's only a week til Christmas Eve! I'll catch up with stuff later, but today I wanted to elaborate on something I mentioned last time--my Buy Nothing group.

Have you heard of the Buy Nothing Project? This is something that was started by two friends back in 2013, after one of them made a trip to a village where everything was shared, including the animals, gardens, etc. When one family was finished with something, it was shared with someone else, and if someone had a need, others would fill it. Sounds a little Utopian, doesn't it? Well that sparked an idea that Liesl Clark and Rebecca Rockefeller carried out in Bainbridge, WA in 2013, and is now in over 30 countries around the world.

Here's how it works. These are FaceBook groups that are formed in communities, to keep it local, and the Mission is this:

 "We offer people a way to give and receive, share, lend, and express gratitude through a worldwide network of hyper-local gift economies in which the true wealth is the web of connections formed between people who are real-life neighbors."

 Basically, you ask for what you need, and you give from your own abundance.Everyone has something to offer, because gifts are not only objects, but can be gifts of time, talent, or self. Some of the things being gifted or requested right now on my group's site are coats, dog toys, baby formula, Christmas decorations, a sofa, art supplies, cute coffee mugs for an after-school program, bookcase, heated vest for a flagger, VHS tapes, puzzles, a floor lamp, a go-cart that needs work, baby dolls, jewelry, space heater, rice cooker, and the list goes on. One of our members has a list of 30 families who are in need of things for Christmas, and she has been gathering gifts since October. We have donated clothing, laundry detergent, toys, bath products, towels and washcloths and a bazillion other things that she has already been wrapping and delivering.

But we are not charity groups. We are like ultimate recyclers, keeping things out of the landfill, squeezing every bit of usefulness out of of ordinary objects. Someone decided to clear out their nail polishes, and a couple of pre-teen daughters were delighted to have them. I don't drink coffee and am vegan, so I asked for coffee grounds and eggshells for my composter--and got more than I expected! And in the process, we meet each other, get to know each other, and care for each other. We have carried meals to those who have had surgery, we have shared plants from our gardens to help landscape a new home, and we have celebrated the birth of many babies. 

Want to learn more? Go to https://buynothingproject.org/find-a-group/, and check for your country or town. Can't find one? Then think about starting one!  That's what I did. About a year after moving here, my daughter told me about the group she'd joined and told me I should join my local group--except there wasn't one. She declared I should just start one and so I did! We will be 2 years old tomorrow, and we have almost 900 members now! 
I hope you'll join a group, or start your own. The perks are amazing!

Delusions

My corneal infection has healed, thank goodness. Now I'm just left with the scarring. Ironic that this whole thing started in order to smooth out the surface of my eye in preparation for cataract surgery--and now it's more irregular than ever. I think my vision is marginally better. but still have to close that eye when reading, or tape it shut while driving, in order not to squint so much with the left eye, because that just diminishes my overall vision even more. Plus the light gets really distorted. I'll be on Prednisone drops 4 times a day for the next month in hopes of reducing the scarring. After the first infection, I was on them closer to 3 months, so I'm anticipating on being on the drops another month after that.

To try and satisfy my creative itch, I spent several hours this past week trying to clean up and organize the sewing?craft room. I had managed to clear out some bins, and had room to group more like items together. There were things I have no idea why I'd bought, so I got rid of a few items through my Buy Nothing group. This went to a guy who said his wife sews and always needs him to help with snaps and things and he was delighted to get it.

I'm sure I bought it for some project, but whatever it was is long gone from my head. I must have had this thing 4-5 years and never opened it. Does anyone else do this? Buy things for a project in mind, then never get to it and forget what it was?

Or, do you hate to let go of things because you just might need them some day? Or you plan to do this great idea you saw on Pinterest, but the months go by and you just don't get to it?

I have a bunch of beads and jewelry supplies, some of which I've had for years.

 

I had thoughts of taking apart some old necklaces I haven't worn for decades, and using the pendants to make a charm necklace of sorts. I have the tools to make those stamped metal pieces and some charms to dangle, as well as wire cutters, and pliers, and findings, and old beloved watch faces--and I don't know how or where to start.

















 But you know as soon as you get rid of something, you'll get an idea, or find a use for them. Isn't that always the way it is? So that part of the organizing was no more than just fumbling through the drawers, pulling out one item to give away, and shutting the drawers again.

My daughter will be swearing at my tombstone some day.

In the "making progress" department, I went to Michael's and bought some yarn. It was buy one, get one at 50% off--how could I not? And a few crocheting books. And another set of hooks because I hadn't tackled the sewing room yet, where I later found a complete set of hooks I didn't remember I had. (I am turning into my father, God rest his soul!) I began working on a hooded scarf for myself while binge-watching "Once Upon a Time". So many shows I never saw, because I worked nights and couldn't record them all, are showing up on Netflix. Hallelujah!



After I finish this, or after Thanksgiving, whichever comes first (because daughter and granddaughter are coming to our house this year and I don't want them to see), I will start on a sampler afghan for Hazel to snuggle up under while watching TV. At Michael's I bought a chest with Frozen 2 pictures on it, and chose yarn in those colors. I plan to put the afghan and some other little Frozen 2 items in it for Christmas. My hands are not as sore as they were the first few nights, so maybe it'll go a little faster than the scarf has. (The book said the scarves were quick projects to do in a weekend. Ha! (Guess that didn't include ripping the stitches out 3 times, then choosing another pattern.) Aren't the colors just scrumptious? Can't wait to get to it!



But in less than an hour, the mid-season finale of The Walking Dead will be coming on, and I need to be sitting there, yarn and hook in hand. Can't miss it!

I hope you all have a wonderful week, especially those celebrating Thanksgiving, and may you enjoy this time with family and friends!

The Eyes Have Had It!

Wow, it got cold this week!  Most of the leaves are down after the big Halloween storm, but there are a few holdouts in the neighborhood. My daughter says one of her front yard trees has dropped lovely yellow leaves, while the sugar maple has dropped reddish-orange ones. She said they are just too pretty to chop up right now, so will wait til next weekend to do her last mowing/mulchng. My yard is mostly tree-less--a small maple in the front yard, a small oak in the side, and a young dogwood in the back. And a redbud in a pot right now til I decide where I can put it.

When the developer built this neighborhood, which was a really wooded area, they hauled of tons of topsoil--and then brought back only a few truckloads per yard. So I have about 3 inches of topsoil before hitting clay and rock. What a waste. The couple who lived here before us had grown too old and frail to do much, although it's evident she had done a lot when they first moved in. There were a lot of overgrown bushes, and flowerbeds that had tons of weeds growing on top of the landscape fabric. It's evident she liked purple, though--and that's my favorite color, so I'm not complaining!

I have added a few of my own, also in purple, but keeping up with so many  beds is no easy task. I hate to be like a millennial and take it all out, but the thought has occurred to me. We'll just wait and see what the new year brings.

Just when I was beginning to see a little more clearly, and had gotten some inexpensive bifocal readers to use for reading and hopefully sewing, I woke up Wed. with the same symptoms I had last summer-- swollen eyeball, tenderness to the touch, that feeling when you have something in your eye,  hypersensitivity to light, and very blurred vision, like trying to see through vaseline on a window.  Not good. I phoned my eye doctor, but they couldn't work me in til Thurs., so I agreed to see a partner at another office. It was either that, or take myself to the ER at UVA in hopes of seeing my residents from the summer.

The eye, my right eye, is infected again, and we have no idea why. It is on its way to another corneal ulcer. He had me start back on one of the fortified antibiotic eye drops I had from UVA, and got me in to see my regular ophthalmologist on Thurs. She discontinued those drops, started me on 2 others and an ointment, and I saw her again on Fri.  There was a little healing, but also a new abrasion showed up that day, though my comfort level was much better. Apparently I am some sort of self--infector, (wonder if there is a Halloween costume for that?) though why this has started now is a mystery. If they publish an article on me, I want part of the proceeds!   I see one of her partners tomorrow and then she's back in town on Tuesday, and I have strict instructions to call the on-call doc for any worsening symptoms.

So, no sewing yet. I can't see the third line on the eye chart, and I was reading the 5th line two weeks ago. This is driving me nuts. I've decided to finish packing away all the Halloween props in the shed (don't judge, I was doing that when it all went south!), do some heavy-duty house cleaning, and then I'm going to dig around in my sewing room for something else to do with my hands. Maybe I should take up crocheting again. I'd have to buy more yarn, but I still have my needles. I should probably start working on Christmas cards, even though my handwriting is likely to be shaky.

Or, I know I have some Christmassy crafts to paint, and there were some ornaments made with 2 1/2" strips of Christmas fabric and styrofoam balls I had started probably 10 years ago. Found them!

Maybe I'll finish these and make some more. Lord knows I have a ton of Christmas fabric I'd love to use up, I've had some of it so long, I'm tired of it, but this would be fun to work on. I need some more straight pins, and some beads, and more ribbon.... This could get a little pricey! lol! But hey, cheaper than therapy!

Grieving Dog Update and more

Just wanted to let you all know what happened, in case you ever run into this same situation.

Here's what my friend posted on FaceBook:

"Bear update- a friend saw
On tv (I think that’s where it came from) that it helps one dog grieve for another if they witness the burial. That wasn’t an option for us but we did have _____'s collar and it had stayed on him until just before we left the vet office that morning. From all these crime shows I watch I know dogs can pick up the smell of death so easily and I thought at the least maybe some illness pheromones? We had to try something because Bear decided to stop eating yesterday morning....

So we get ____’s collar and go outside and let Bear sniff it. His whole body started shaking like you wouldn’t believe! He was barking a weird kind of bark and just shaking like a leaf and I was scared maybe this was a bad idea! But we went over to the hole we’d made and put _____’s collar in a bag, put it in the hole and covered it up. We sat there a couple minutes and said _____’s name and he kinda circled and barked then we went to the shed steps and just loved on him a while. He went to gate wanting to go to the front yard so I took him out there and he only stayed a few minutes, no crying/whining, and then walked himself right back to the backyard. That was it. He hasn’t whined since and he’s eaten his food! Did he somehow understand the ‘burial’ or did he smell something on the collar? Don’t know- I wouldn’t say he’s a happy, happy dog but I don’t think he’s in distress anymore."....

That's amazing, isn't it? I never would have thought of doing that! And Patty, I couldn't find a way to answer your comment, but I'm glad your story had a happy ending, too.

If you've read my blog in the past, you know I'm a Halloween freak. I LOVE the holiday and I love doing different things in my yard every year. Well this Halloween turned out to be a humdinger.  Not only were we expecing thunderstorms, but they included a tornado watch and predicted wind gusts up to 50 mph from 4-9 pm--right smack dab in the middle of Trick or Treating time. So Thursday I took everything down.  It had already started a steady sprinkling, on top of some rain we had earlier in the week.  As I was taking a handful of rebar to the shed, I stepped onto the greenish slippery ramp--and down I went. My foot slid right back down to the ground, and I bounced my face off the handful of rebar.

Bam!  First black eye I've ever had! It did shake me up a little. I had to sit there in the wet grass for a bit before I could get up. I was feeling every bit of my 68 years for the first time ever. Jack got me a couple of extra-strength Tylenol, and I put an ice pack on it for as long as I could stand it. Even the breeze blowing on my face hurt.  By morning, my eye was swollen shut. But everything got put right back out on Friday, which was a gloriously sunny, chilly day. Temps had gone from 70s on Thurs. to 50s on Fri.

Because the high school football game was Friday night, and they are undefeated, our little town decided to have Trick or Treat on Sat.  By Sat. evening it was cold and breezy. The kids were out early, by 5:30, so I had no time to get pictures. All I have is one from Wed. night, when I was checking my lighting:

Most of our visitors were in a hurry to get back home out of the cold--or to move on for more candy!--but I got great feedback from the adults, and some of the kids, too. One little girl even complimented me on my "make-up".  lol

This is how my eye looked yesterday. Great makeup, right?  lol  My face was too sore to put a mask on, so I just wore regular clothes.

Now I get to take it all down again! Every year about this time, I swear I'm done. I'm not going to do a yard haunt any more. And every year, by August (if not sooner) I'm planning what I'm going to do. I've actually started planning my costume for next year.....

Happy November!

Dogs

Today has been a tough one for me.

Remember my dog, Tandi?

Well, we had to put Tandi down in April, a month before her 15th birthday. Six months ago today, actually.  She was almost 3 years old when we got her from the cocker rescue group, but it felt like she'd been with us forever. She was my heart and soul dog, the one who will always live on with me, the one I miss every day. The last year, we had her at the vet so often with one thing after another, I called her my little Energizer bunny, because she kept going, and going, and going.... Finally it was clear that her quality of life had decreased significantly, and the kindest thing was to give her some relief. It was the hardest decision I've ever made, and the only dog I've actually had to make that decision for. I've had them go missing, get stolen, get hit by a car and die in my arms, die when no one was around, but never have I had to make the decision to put one down. It sucks. 

A friend of mine had to put one of her dogs down this week. She and her husband had rescued two dogs from a neglectful situation about a year ago, and had given them the lives they deserved. The dogs were so happy not to be chained up any more, to have free run of the fenced in yard, to have a large doghouse that was cool in the summer and heated in the winter, to have decent food to eat, toys (they'd never had toys--didn't know quite what to do with them at first!), and so much love and attention. Then one developed cancer about a month ago, took a sudden turn for the worse this week and there were no other options. The remaining dog is grieving, making such a mournful sound, it breaks all our hearts. I've never had two dogs at a time, so I don't know how to help my friend. It has brought me to tears more than once today.


But, there is a happy side to today's story. Meet Ziva, our newest rescue:

Someone dropped this sweet, 6-yr-old cockapoo off at a high-kill shelter in another part of VA, and the adoption agency in a nearby town scooped her up. She was already spayed, completely housebroken, knew a few commands, and will flop over and present her tummy for rubbing if you even look her way. She's funny, smart, quirky, and has blessed us so much in the 5 months we've had her. She makes me laugh every day, and although Jack initially wanted another cocker spaniel, I'm really grateful she isn't full-blooded. I think that would have been unfair to a new dog. The vet's office was so excited to meet her, and we all marvel that she has Tandi's coloring; it's like she was meant for us. Maybe Tandi picked her out and sent her our way. I like to think that, anyway. It makes today a little easier. 

Fall doings

Hallelujah, fall weather has arrived! I thought those 90s were going to last forever! Temps are in the 50s and 60s with night time temps 40s and 50s. We even had a 34 this week!  Halloween decorations are sprouting everywhere--except for the guy where our street "Ts" into another. He put his up in mid-September! To his credit, though, he has a yard full, and even though it's pretty much the same setup every year, it's fun to look at.

Mine are going up this week. I tried to get them all up sooner, but a combination of having the house power-washed and waiting for the guy who cuts my grass to show up (he still hasn't!), I just couldn't put much out.We had some rain earlier, and some MD appts, but today is supposed to be beautiful, so I'm headed out to get more done. This year's theme is Halloween Party, or more accurately, Costume Ball, so all my skeletons are dressing up.  Here is Hazel with Sleeping Beauty:


She is just the age when some of the things I have scare her a little, but dress-up is something she totally understands!  lol  She will be spending the weekend with me, so we will do a little more in the yard.

Went to move a couple of skeletons off the front porch and into the yard, and movement spooked me a little. Skeletons aren't supposed to move!

Apparently my work was being inspected closely!  lol

Here's the house before and after power washing. Such a difference!













 Wasn't that sky beautiful?  It was a gorgeous day to clean up!

 Had my eye appt yesterday. The additional weeks of Prednisone drops have impoved my vision and decreased my scarring. In a month, if there is no more improvement, we'll schedule the cataract surgery. If there is continued improvement, it will be up to me. I can have the astigmatism lens put in and run the risk of over-correcting it as the scars continue to heal, or I can wait a few more months for the cataract surgery.  Part of me, okay, ALL of me, is ready for my vision to be back to "normal", but I do want to give my eye the best chance I can.

Well, we'll see what next month brings. I ordered some reading glasses off of Readers.com yesterday, hoping that may allow me to do some sewing. Every time I walk into my sewing room, my hands just itch to pick up some of my UFOs and make progress, but being unable to see well enough to thread a needle is a bit of a stumbling block! Thank goodness I have plenty of books on my Kindle, where I can enlarge the print, because being unable to sew AND read?  Jack would probably kick me my whiney butt out!

Shards

And the milk glass saga continues.... I shipped 10 boxes, 144 pieces, to my friend 2 weeks ago. She was out of town when it arrived, but got back home that evening. And look what she found:


THREE boxes with every piece shattered, and there was at least 1 broken item in each box. 10 boxes. 35 broken items. The boxes look like they were run over by the truck, not transported in it.

We are both so upset. My mother began collecting milk glass for me when I was 15 years old. Some pieces were older than that, because I found them at antique stores, and they are at least as old as I am. Fortunately, she had not yet mailed the check, as she had been out of town, so we are waiting for UPS to process the claim. I'm pushing for full insurance payment on each box, but will settle for full insurance on the three boxes that were full of shards, and my shipping fee. Some of the items that broke were the least common--the 14" platter, the 5 thumbprint goblets, the scalloped bowl with the "trumpets" that held flowers. And there is no way to measure the sentimental value.

Last winter we ordered Jack a rolling tray and cup holder with storage underneath. He is a high fall risk, especially when not using his cane, and was on blood thinners at the time, so his hematologist insisted he have something to use when he wasn't using his cane, such as when he's carrying food to the den to eat. UPS delivered the box crunched in on the side, and when I removed it, the entire right wheel was bent inward. How do they get by with this? Fortunately, I had bought it from Amazon, so we were able to exchange it for another one, but it took UPS 3 weeks to come get it from my house. They gave me all kinds of hassle about it, until I finally called and told Amazon the difficulty I was having. Then they came out TWICE to pick it up. How does UPS get by with this behavior?  I will not be shipping with them ever again.

Moving on to my happy place. Halloween decor has begun! My theme this year is not a scary one. It's a fun theme -- Halloween Party!  All my skeletons will be dressed in costumes this year. I already have one of my tiny ones in a Supergirl costume Hazel has worn for dress-up. Beginning around the first of October I start pulling out my skeletons one by one and posing them, starting with the porch, and moving out to the yard after a next-to-last lawn mowing. I love playing with them, and I've had some of my neighbors tell me how they look forward to seeing what the skeletons are doing on a daily basis. Little by little, my fall decorations become spookier, and then they all revert to simply fall again in November.

See the skeleton hand on the lantern? My two oldest skeletons, the ones you see here, are falling apart. Some body parts were being held together with zip ties, but even those aren't working any more. Slowly, as they fall apart, they are being gathered together for the bone pit. Sometimes they appear in a wheelbarrow full of dirt, sometimes in front of tombstones, and sometimes in a fire pit. Always useful!

Yesterday and today, the temps finally dropped below 80. Last week we had several 90+ days! So glad fall is truly here!

Sold!

I sold the milk glass!  A fellow nurse I worked with 10 years ago bought all of it. She's been in Arizona, but has moved back to NC to help care for her aging parents. She loved the pictures and asked if I'd ship it to her. That seemed rather daunting. But ship I did! Ten boxes, that cost over $150 to ship, so I dropped the price on my dishes by $50 to help offset the total, because I never planned on having to ship them anywhere. I packed them just as I did when moving from one state to another, so I'm hoping UPS will be extra careful.  In fact, when these were stored in my garage, they were in 9 boxes--and I sold about 10 pieces to my next door neighbor. I kept a few of  my favorite pieces in the picture below, as well as a cracked plate, and a pair of cracked candle holders. Still, after inventorying and repacking--they went into 10 boxes! I think I cushioned those babies well.



It is such a relief to see them go. I was beginning to dislike the sight of them, just because they have been partially boxed in my living room since April, and I didn't want that to be my memory of them. But it feels much better to have those boxes gone. I mean, I already have about 15 bins of fabric and a 6 ft table in there. Obviously, we don't use the living room! I try to keep it as neat as possible, since it's just right there when anyone walks in, but hey, I need the space.

With the help of a friend who buys auction lots and resells items, and pieces from my deceased mother-in-law and grandparents, I have accumulated quite a lot of crocheted doilies. I  remember them being all over my grandmothers' and great-grandmothers' houses, on tables and arms of sofas, etc. and haven't seen them used that way for decades. But an acquaintance of mine mentioned she was looking for some to hang on her wall. That was an intriguing idea, so I searched Pinterest and look what I found: (click on the pics to go to the site and see the whole picture)







Aren't these amazing? I anxious to try my hand at some of these. Someone in my Buy Nothing group was gifting some small canvasses, which I was happy to receive. I'm thinking of maybe painting a couple and making wall hangings for my bedroom. I have a quart jar of old buttons, too, which would go well with this. Since I still can't sew, because of the double vision in my eye, as well as the worsening cataract, I'm thinking (once Halloween is over) this would help feed my creative needs for a while.

Next visit with my ophthalmologist is October 8, and I'm hoping we will finally be able to set a surgery date. Then roughly another month til it's all healed and we can get an accurate vision test for a new pair of glasses. The current prescription is already almost 4 years old, so I wasn't seeing my sharpest even before the eye issues! Keeping my fingers crossed!

Cooler Weather!

Yay! The past couple of days have been in the '70s with night time temps in the '40s and '50s! Yes, Virginia, there IS an autumn!  I feel more energetic already!

The Halloween workshop didn't happen. One gal had to work and the other two just said they couldn't come. No reasons offered. I admit I was a little annoyed, as I had spent hours the day before going through my shed, pulling out examples to show, and freebies to give. So, I'm just going to spend some more time in the shed sorting through my bins and deciding what to give away. Kind of a Marie Kondo does Swedish Death Cleansing.

I've decided to get rid of all my milk glass. My mother started that collection for me back in the '60s, and I bought pieces here and there over the years.

 My next door neighbor bought some pieces from me before she moved this past May, and I was communicating with a woman who has a booth at an antique mall about 25 minutes from here, thinking she was going to buy it. She hasn't bothered to respond to me, so I guess that deal is off. It kind of got put on the back burner this summer with all the health issues, but everything is inventoried, wrapped, and packed in boxes--all 144 pieces of it!

 I really love some of these pieces, and stumbled on some not-so-common pieces over the years, but it's time to let them go. My daughter isn't interested in them, and it'll be another 25  or so years before Hazel would want them--or she might not! My daughter would shoot me if I left this for her to deal with when I die!  lol

So, I've put them on Craigslist in 4 different cities, as the local auction seems to show there is  no interest in milk glass in this area. It's small, and rural, and most everyone here goes for primitive items. I don't want to try to unpack them and sell them piece by piece on Etsy or marketplace, and one of my friends who used to sell on eBay pulled everything off because their shipping regulations got too complicated to make it worth her while any more. If worse comes to worse, I'll just donate it all and take it off on my income taxes next year! 

What do you collect? (Besides fabric, of course!) Are you planning to pass it on to your children or if not, what will you do with it?

And the Summer Just Lingers On....

It's 95 degrees outside with a heat factor of 101 degrees. What is up with that?  I started putting up fall decorations inside and outside because I love fall, and I love the autumn colors, and I just got impatient. I'm sure I jinxed it. Blame me.  Tomorrow is supposed to be just as hot, then the high Friday is in the 70s. Yay! And back to the 80s for the next week or so. Sigh.

Saturday I'm having a few friends over to do a Make-and-Take Halloween-on-a-budget workshop. We're going to make groundbreakers from tomato cages, and there are a few extra items I'm giving them. We'll talk about ways to use yard sale finds, garden finds, and discards to turn yards and porches into fun scenes. But if this weather doesn't cool down a bit, no one is going to feel up to being outside, even if it IS in my garage with the side door open for a breeze. But I want them to have a few more weeks to scour yard sales for possibilities and with a new eye.




Jack came home from rehab Friday. Thank goodness. I was beginning to really enjoy having the house all to my self! I was able to turn the AC to a warmer temp and use the ceiling fans (he doesn't like air blowing on him), the TV didn't run from before sunrise to midnight (he's the early bird; I'm the night owl), and the power bill went down by $36 for the month of August. When I cleaned off the counter top, it stayed cleaned. The bathrooms stayed cleaner. (Ahem!) One unseasonably cool day, I opened all the screened windows, doors, got an oldies station synced with Alexa and the Echos throughout the house, and sang as loudly as I wanted while cleaning. I took an afternoon and went to see "The Art of Racing in the Rain" at the movie theater. I have never lived alone, so it was kind of fun.

But, I was not good about cooking for myself, especially when tired, so I ate a lot of peanut butter and banana sandwiches. I spent a lot of time going back and forth between home and rehab, because I was still doing his laundry. When he was feeling down or wanted to tell me something before he forgot, he called me on the phone. Several times a day. I had to drive myself everywhere, both in the bright sunshine and at night, and had to travel to Charlottesville for my final eye appointment at UVA. As bad a driver as I believe him to be, it was scary to be back to navigating the interstate with only one eye and no one to help me watch for other cars. I stayed in the right hand lane. And I heard noises at night. I hear them at night when he's home and asleep, too, but there's something about hearing noises when you're alone that's disconcerting.

So, it's good to have him home again.  After all, we've been married almost 48 years. I've grown accustomed to his face, as the song says.

“Old age ain't no place for sissies.”-- Bette Davis

Good morning! I know it's still hot outside, but can you feel autumn coming? There's something about the light that lets me know fall is on its way. I was out weed-eating this morning, and, hot and humid as it is, it just feels different out there.

Yes, I was weed-eating!  I'm sure the neighbors will be grateful; some of those weeds were up to my waist! I was very careful, but it felt so good to diminish the abandoned look the house was beginning to take on. I probably should have left it til after Halloween, but I just couldn't stand it much longer. My eye is improving. I'm only on prednisone eye drops three time a day now, and there is a 4-week gap between doctor visits. I can drive in the daytime, as long as I tape that eye shut, which I also do with night driving, and anytime I need to read. The vision in that eye is still blurry, which interferes with my overall sight.  Still not able to see well enough to sew, so I think I may carry my Bernina in to be serviced. That hasn't been done in 4 1/2 years, though I've only really sewn maybe a total of a year, what with work, selling a house, buying a house, moving, etc.  Once I get the remaining cataract removed, and new glasses, I will be in hog heaven!  Unfortunately, life has thrown us a curve ball again. Isn't that always the way it is?



Jack was due to have a colonoscopy last week, but it had to be cancelled--again. If I haven't said, my husband is a stroke survivor, which occurred when he was 32. He (and I) have lived with this for almost 40 years now, and he gets along really well, considering his entire left side is paralyzed. He can walk with a cane, a splint, and a trunk/hip swing movement, but he can't walk and talk at the same time. He needs to concentrate on each step, or he'll fall.

Last Wed, in the wee hours of the morning, trying to quickly respond to the nature's call of the colonoscopy prep (need I say more?), he slipped and fell in the bathroom. I had to call our volunteer rescue squad because I couldn't get him up alone, and once they helped him to his feet, it was obvious he couldn't stand. X-rays showed a fractured left ankle. So they put a fiberglass splint on his leg, and admitted him to the hospital, because he obviously cannot function here. Friday afternoon they transferred him to a rehab facility, and we're looking at a 2-6 week stay. He has a walking boot now, so he can bear weight as tolerated, which isn't much, but better than a week ago. He's a very determined person who values his independence, so he will work hard to get home as quickly as possible. Just don't know how long until he can get around, and since for a week after cataract surgery I am not allowed to bend over, or lift more than 10 lbs, we will be postponing the procedure. We are such a pair--the half-lame and the half-blind!

I am SO looking forward to being able to see clearly again. I had so many projects planned for this summer, indoors and out, and had sorted out some of my UFOs to work on. Right now, I can't even thread a needle. You should see my try to put toothpaste on my toothbrush.  Good thing I'm standing over a sink!

A new friend decided to start a book club, so 4 of us got together last week for our first meeting. For this month, at least, we decided to all read the same book, although we might alternate months where we read our own choices and then report back to the group with recommendations. Our first book is an older one, so that we can all get copies in our small town. Fortunately, it's on Audible, so I can listen to it: Major Pettigrew's Last Stand. Darlene (our host) had read the book before, and suggested we start with that one, as she is happy to read it again. I listened to a sample and it sounds perfectly charming! I may start it this week, while Jack is being cared for at rehab. Soon enough, he'll be home and I'll have my hands full!

Visions

Well, I finished blocks 5 & 6, but that's as far as I got. The QAL ended, but the block tutorials are still there, so I will get back to 7, 8, and 9 a little later, and then I think I'll do the on point layout.

All sewing, quilting, gardening and reading has pretty much come to a halt. June 5 I had the cataract in my left eye removed, which meant no bending or lifting greater than 10 lbs for a week. It has healed well, and I was to have the right cataract removed July 24. However, I have something called "mapdot fingerprint", which is a swirl of bumpiness on my corneas. The right one was more severe, enough that they couldn't get the measurements for the intraocular lens, so my doctor decided to do a corneal scraping 5 weeks ago. The term still makes me shudder.

I ended up with a nasty infection, and have been going to the eye clinic at UVA hospital 2-3 days/week for the last few weeks. My right eye stays taped shut except for eye drops, and finally, the surface of my eye has healed. I still have a lot of corneal swelling, though, so the vision in that eye is like looking through a glass block. I still can't tolerate bright light, but that has improved a little. I don't wear sunglasses indoors any more, but all the drapes are drawn and we keep the lights to a minimum. Being able to type this is a big step forward. I can drive at night now, but still can't drive in the daylight.

It has been so frustrating, and boring--once the pain began subsiding. The only way to really rest that eye has been to rest the other one, since your eyes function in synchronated movements. Watching TV was difficult, so when I could find a much-watched movie, I could sit and listen to it, without having to see what was going on. Thank goodness for friends and family! Jack has driven me to all our appointments (me white-knuckling it the whole way, but that's another story) and to the grocery store when needed. Since my left eye is now better, the lens in my glasses was no longer the correct prescription, so the office made me a cheap bifocal lens to help, and I use a magnifying glass when I need to. A sweet friend of mind brought me some books on tape, and my daughter got me set up with Audible, so time spent lying down in a dark room is much more appealing now. The docs say I shouldn't get the other cataract done for a couple of months, so guess we're looking at the end of September.

In the meantime, the flower beds are all overgrown with weeds, squash bugs got to my squash, and the cherry tomatoes haven't been very prolific, because they don't get watered enough. The herbs are struggling, and Dawn's quilt is still unfinished, as are some hand projects I had been working on. My fingers are itching to sew, but I just don't see well enough yet. My gardening tan has faded. BUT--I finally finished Dr. Sleep, and have "read" 4 other books as well, so all is not lost!




Snapped this picture right before the corneal scraping. I had planted several coneflower plants last summer, and they were just beginning to bloom the end of June. It's so gratifying to see the butterflies feasting on these and the butterfly bushes the previous owner planted. My goal for next summer is to increase the types of butterfly- and pollinator-friendly flowers in my flowerbeds. Here's hoping life doesn't get in the way, again!

Blocks 3 & 4

Well, Block #9 of the Hand -pieced Quilt Along was released this past Monday, and I just finished blocks 3 and  4. No matter, I'll finish the rest in my own time. I had to make block 3 three times to get something I was satisfied with. Block 4 was a bit easier, but still a little tricky. I had never done QSTs before. So, since it's after midnight, and a new link-up starts in the morning, I'm going to post this with no further ado.

Block 3:

Block 4:

Here's the link to Patty's blog: Elm Street Quilts  and here's the one to Kristin's: Simple, Handmade, Everyday

Maybe I can get another block or two done this weekend, before Hazel comes to spend a few days with us.

Struggles

I really thought I would be farther along in the Hand-Pieced Quilt Along I posted about, but I have cut and sewn, and recut and resewn this block, and now I realize I reversed my colors, so I need to re-recut and re-resew! AGGHHH!

I didn't do well on making the flying geese block using triangles--they just didn't line up right, so I must have stretched those bias edges or something.

 Went back to doing them my favorite way--with rectangles and squares and stitch and flipping. They all turned out well, but as I got ready to join my last seam, I realized I had reversed my background fabric with the colors.

Not to mention I lost a few points there. So, it's back to the cutting mat. Meanwhile, back at the QAL, block 8 was released today. I'm still on block 3.  Sigh.

It's been a tough fall and winter. The weather has been so wet for so many months--I think there has only been one week since July that it hasn't rained or snowed. The ark jokes are getting old. Usually, rainy weather doesn't bother me, but both the dog and the husband have had multiple health issues, requiring multiple vet and doctor visits, and more time and care from me. Add this to the many responsibilities I already have because of Jack's disability, and the hits to the bank account, and I found myself floundering, struggling to be the support my family needs.

So for the first time, I sought out the assistance of a counselor.  It almost made me feel like a failure, not being able to cope, not being able to pull myself up by the bootstraps and forge on. Oh, I wasn't having suicidal thoughts. To me, that's a clear cut sign of needing help. I just walked around on the verge of tears all the time. Simple tasks became monumental.  I got up, got dressed, and got us to all the appointments on time. Kept the grandbaby when my daughter came down with pneumonia and bronchitis. Got the laundry done, and the house reasonably clean. But it just felt as if I was slogging through waist-deep water all the time. I gave up going to the Y because of all the scheduling conflicts, and I didn't substitute with home exercises or walking. (Raining, right?) Meal planning and cooking became too hard, so Jack ate frozen meals (which he prefers, because I'm vegan and he's not) and too often I'd just make a pb&j, because it didn't require any thought. Bought too much junk processed food. Gained back the 35 pounds I had lost. Couldn't sleep through the night, yet wanted to sleep all day. Something had to change.

Now, thanks to Kelley, I am coping again. I am back on track. Not that the problems have gone away; they never do, do they? Tandi still has health problems, and if she makes it to May 27, she will be 15 years old--that's really old for a cocker spaniel. Jack's health issues fluctuate, but we are staying positive and we are supporting each other. It's still a little one-sided, but that's the nature of marriage, the whole "in sickness and in health" clause. Finances have dictated that I put aside counseling for now, but I have promised my husband and my counselor not to let myself get into crisis mode again. If I start feeling overwhelmed, help is only a phone call away.


I tell you all this to say that if you find yourself feeling some of those same things--unrelenting sadness, inability to make decisions or take care of yourself properly, sleep disruptions, lack of interest in things that used to bring you joy, misplaced anger or irritability-- please, seek counseling. There are professionals who are able to help, and who can help you find your way back. Check your workplace's EAP program. See what your health insurance covers. Talk to you doctor.  Mine added acute stress disorder, with an explanation, to my online chart. Unfortunately, my medicare advantage plan didn't cover it, but I found a counselor who has a sliding scale payment plan. Check out Psychology Today's website. There you can find licensed therapists in your area who specialize in all different areas. Read their bios, lists of what they cover, their philosophies, and their financial requirements. Most will let you email or phone them for a free initial contact, to determine if they can help you and if they are a good fit for you. I started with a list of 22 possibilities, and narrowed it down to two. Kelley answered my email, and not only was that free, but so was my first visit. It was a good match.

Recognizing I needed help, and asking for it, did not make me a failure. It was a sign of my strength. So please, if you're struggling, do this for yourself. You deserve it.