End of an Era

Back in late July, I had the privilege of caring for the husband of the couple who own the closest local quilt shop.  (There was another one just a couple miles further, but they relocated about a year ago.) They have an unusual last name, but clueless me didn't make the connection until the off-going day nurse mentioned I would probably get along well with the wife, as she had lots of quilty stuff with her, and hmmm, she thinks they own a quilt shop. Duh.

I'm just one of many customers, and not a regular, so she didn't know me of course, but we talked quilting and about her daughter and son-in-law, (who service Berninas and used to live in my neighborhood) and cruising. When this couple lived in Florida, they used to arrange cruises for folks--didn't understand that part entirely--and we discussed cruise lines, etc. All in all, a pleasant case and I was able to get him comfortable enough to sleep through the night. I was off work the next two nights and when I came back, he was gone, so I assumed he'd gone on home.

On Thurs. before the trip, I dropped my Bernina off at the shop to be cleaned and oiled and serviced while I was gone, as I hadn't had this done since buying it second hand 3 years ago. It was then I learned that David had died! Seems he was diagnosed with stage IV cancer the day after I took care of him, was transferred to the hospital in Asheville, and died 2 weeks later. I was shocked--I'd had no idea. I dashed off a sympathy note to his wife and dropped it in the mail the next morning.

A few days after I returned (and could manage not to sneeze my head off!), I picked up my machine, which had been serviced by Pete Bonesteel, husband of Georgia Bonesteel, of lap quilting fame (!)  The family was still recovering from the loss.  I renewed my 20/20 membership there ($20/year for 20% off all non-sale items all year long) when I paid for the machine.  The next week, I dropped by the shop in search of some more blacks for some Hallowe'en wall hangings I've started. Usually I just get a few fat quarters, but I was having trouble finding many. While searching, I heard a customer ask didn't the shop carry something-or-other, and the shop gal said they usually did, but they were in the middle of a going-out-of-business sale and didn't have any more. Clueless me again--I whipped my head around, and noticed for the first time how empty all the shelves were looking. There were sale signs on all the Horn tables, most of the notions had disappeared, and the long-arm machine was gone out of the shop. None of this was present 5 days before, so the decision had to have been made over the weekend. I'm assuming the shop help got first dibs on items in the shop, because they hadn't advertised the sale and there were no signs outside.
I guess the shop must have been too much for one person to handle, so she decided to just close down.  The signs stated everything was 40% off if you paid by check or card, and 50% off if you paid by cash.  So the next day I came back in with some of my pocket savings and loaded up. I felt like a darned vulture, but told myself she needed the money and I "needed" the fabric, and that's just life.

I loaded up on solids, and fabrics that "read as solids", and some that will coordinate with some rose fabrics I intend to put together later this winter. I also needed more kid fabrics, as I'd like to make some I Spy quilts for my great-nephews.

Grand total before discount: $198.00. And mostly in fat quarters, with a little yardage thrown in, as minimum cuts were one yard. With taxes and discount, $101.06.  And that included 2 cute little jack-o-lantern candleholders I couldn't pass up. All that fabric has been washed and dried, and about 1/2 of it has been ironed and put away. The rest is still piled up on the cutting table, ready for another marathon ironing session, but heaven knows where I'm going to store it.  I am running out of room.

I drove by there the first week of October. The shop is empty, dark, and no signage even to show it was ever there. So very sad. I wish his family the best.

Thoughts

(I started this post 2 weeks ago, then said thunderstorm took out the computer.)


It's a little after 3pm on Sunday. There's a load of clothes in the washer, one in the dryer, and about 3 in the baskets, waiting to be folded.  Tandi, worn out by 5 days at the boarder's, is sprawled on the sofa, one eyeball occasionally following me about the room, but primarily snoring away.  J-Man is sleeping in the recliner, his head propped on his right fist.  I'll bet he'll be awakened by the pins-and-needles sensation soon. All the plants are finally watered, and of course, the summer afternoon rainshower has started, thunder rumbling and echoing around the mountains. It seems like a normal day, but it's surreal following an extraordinary week.

One week ago today, my nephew Garrett succumbed to complications from the injuries acquired in the April 27 tornados in Alabama. One week ago today, he left this earth to be with his wife Jennifer, and his brother Brandon, who also died 10 years ago this week. One week ago today, my other nephew became an only child, and his children became the only grandchildren my brother and sister-in-love will ever have. Odd to think of death in these terms.

Tues. Jack and I left for Birmingham, to stay with Frank and Janell for a few days.  DD was already there, staying with the other nephew and his family. I was prepared to stay at a motel, giving my brother and his wife space to grieve, but they would have none of it. My sister-in-love should have been born under the sign of Cancer, not Leo, because she loves cooking for and tending to a house full of people. Hers is a back-door house, where only deliverymen ring the front doorbell.  Everyone else enters through the kitchen, and close friends as well as family know where the spare key is kept. 

The viewing was at the funeral home Wed. night, scheduled from 5-8 pm, with family coming a half hour early. When they opened the doors, the line was already down the hall, through the foyer, and out to the parking lot, and it was 9pm before everyone had come through and the doors were closed.  Co-workers of Garrett and Jennifer came, as did co-workers of Frank and Janell, old friends, in-laws of family members; nurses who'd cared for Garrett came, and even the wife of the primary ICU physician left her 3-week-old infant to come and convey to my brother and his wife just how much Garrett and his family had meant to her husband. I got to meet Jennifer's parents for the first time, hugged family members I haven't seen in over 40 years, and saw friends from elementary school. It's different when you continue to live in the town where you grew up.

My brother, who has a wonderful voice, sang at yet another son's funeral.   He sang the same song he did at Jennifer's funeral.  I don't know how he did it. The chapel was standing room only. There was a brief graveside ceremony, with both Jennifer's parents and Garrett's parents releasing doves who joined a flock of others and flew home.  Garrett was buried next to where Jenn had been buried 3 1/2 weeks before.

When we got back to the house, friends had already brought chicken, mac and cheese, slaw, baked beans, rolls--Southern food for sure. More friends came bringing more food, pizza, desserts, drinks. At one point, there were 6 little ones, ranging from 14 months to 6 years, a couple of teens, and 28 adults in the house. Guys clustered in front of the big screen TV and some sports event, women swapped birth stories and family gossip, babies were passed from one's hip to another's, barefooted kids ran the circle of rooms, and the kitchen table demographics shifted constantly. My sister's oldest girl had brought several family photo albums she found at her mom's, which prompted my sister-in-love to pull hers out.  We laughed over big hair, sideburns, plaid tennis shoes ("Mom, why'd you let me wear those???), little girls in Easter dresses and little boys in short pants, Christmases past. 

At one point, looking around at it all, my daughter dissolved in tears. "They  should be here."  She was right. It could have been any family gathering--Independence day, a birthday, Thanksgiving. It was a renewing of friendships, relationships, family ties.

In the midst of death, it was a celebration of Life.

2 in One Month

Wow, I'm on a roll, right?  2 blog posts in the same month!

Okay, let's play catchup.  First off, I am trying to get caught up on all your blogs.  Usually I'm able to knock off 10-12 posts or more while at work on slow nights, but I'm precepting a student nurse who will graduate in March and feel I ought to at least  pretend  to work.  She's doing so well, though, she should be finished with me in a couple more weeks.

What else? Well, Workers' Comp is still "investigating" my arm re-inury, but in the meantime they've sent me to one of their docs.  Xrays show no fractures, so it seems I have strained my rotator cuff and my deltoid muscle.  I'm on Celebrex ($130.00 for a 30-day supply!), Flexeril as needed (knocks me for a loop!), physical therapy, and a 40# lifting restriction with no overhead work.  This means Christmas may extend into February.

Yep, the tree's still up. I don't turn the lights on anymore, though.

The PT scheduler, knowing I work nights, tried to be helpful and made my appointments for 8am Mon-Wed-Fri.  People, I don't see the sunrise unless I've worked all night. This getting up at 6:15 to be showered and dressed and at someplace by 8am is killing me! It's not by accident that I work night shift.

Appointments are ruling my life these days:
     Last Tues. I had a repeat mammogram and ultrasound at 10:45 (just fluid cysts again), met with the home medical folks at 1pm to get a new C-PAP mask, and saw the WC doc at 2:45. 

     Today I had PT at 8am, saw my ENT doc at 9:30 and endured the yearly GYN exam at 10:30. 

     Fri. I will have PT at 8:00, get a bone density scan at 9:30am and try for a hair appointment by noon.

     Next Tues. I only have 2 appointments (so far): dental cleaning and a WC follow-up Whatever will I do with myself the rest of the day? 

No sewing or quilting yet this month.  I tend to hunch my shoulders when machine sewing, so that doesn't work, and the forward motion of rotary cutting is one that causes difficulty. I need to dig around and find some handwork to take with me to all these appointments. 

In the meantime, I ordered a Kumiloom starter kit and additional book.  Have you ever heard of kumihimo?  I hadn't til a couple of months ago when someone in blogland mentioned it (can't remember who.)  The starter kit had a few strands of yarn in it, and easy as it looked, my braid was still a little lumpy.  Guess the tension wasn't even.

Anyway, look at some of these examples:

    Bracelet

Examples of braids

I wish you could get a closer look, but that's a fish with bubbles coming out of his mouth--so cute!

How clever is this one?

Not your average friendship bracelets, wouldn't you say?  Apparently some of the art quilters are using this in their work, too, especially with the beading.   I have a lot of beads left from when I used to bead earrings many moons ago, and other sizes that I've added over the years.  I love beads, but really haven't used them in quilting except for that one daisy wallhanging.  I can see myself playing with them again, but doubt I'll ever aspire to this level:

In the true traditional form, you should be on your knees in front of the maru dai, and lifting each thread with the open fingers and hands--not between the thumb and finger.  Very graceful and oriental, but I don't do knees. Or grace.

But I can see how it would be very meditational to work on one of these.

One thing the month has brought, however, has been a LOT of reading.  So far I've read the entire Hunger Games trilogy: The Hunger Games, Catching Fire, and Mockingjay.  (Yeah, I know they're considered young adult fiction, but I liked them. The author really knows how to grab your attention and not let go.)

I've also just finished Sundays at Tiffany's, by James Patterson, author of the Alex Cross novels and the Women's Murder Club mysteries.  It was fluff, a quick read with an interesting premise, but not much thought or substance to it.  No matter. Getting interrupted to go from one waiting room to another requires light reading.

Just to let you know that I do read non-fiction, one of the books I'm currently reading is Handbook to Practical Disaster Preparedness.  No, I am not a Rush Limbaugh fan.  Nor do I want to learn how to skin a squirrel with a pocketknife or eat pine bark.  However, we've had a rash of snowstorms the last couple of years, and I thought it might just be a good idea to figure out a preparedness plan, what to stock, etc., especially since I've had to leave Jack here alone while I spent a couple of days sleeping at the hospital or hotel. If I can have everything together and easily accessible for him, I won't worry as much when I'm gone.  This book encourages you to look at your own situation, what emergencies are likely to occur, and any special needs  you may have, such as small children, pets or disabled adults.  This guy's writing style is  conversational, easy to read, and, well, practical.


Last, but certainly not least, is the $376 plumbing bill today.  Sheesh.  Yesterday I spent several hours trying to plunge and then snake a plugged commode, and the only result was more arm pain.  I felt somewhat validated today when the plumber didn't have any success, either.  So we have a new toilet in the master bath, and a new floater thingy in the guest bedroom's toilet.  I'd post a picture, but really doubt you'd want me to.  Suffice it to say the commode is taller, which is easier for Jack, and it's low-flow. That's not what I would have chosen, but between that and fixing the slow leak, we should see the water bill go down considerably next month.

This has been an expensive month!  If this keeps up and if WC denies my claim, I may meet our annual deductible of $3500.00 all by myself in the first 32 days of the year.

More snow and sleet in the forecast for tomorrow, but no accumulation is "expected".  Doesn't mean it won't happen, though.  But at least we don't have the same problems as this guy:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1453678875/ref=oss_product

Labor Day Fun

Jack and I headed down to Alabama this weekend to see family--some of whom I've never laid eyes on, and some I haven't seen in 10 years or more.  It was fantastic!

We couldn't all get together at the same time, which is probably a good thing, but we got to see all my nieces, nephews, in-laws and out-laws, grandnephews and my grandniece.

Here are some of my favorite pics from the weekend:

(This one's for you, Audrey!)

(The water was only 73 degrees, but we were all crazy enough to go in with our clothes on!)

(Well, not ALL of us.  Some had good sense.)

There was a ton of food; we are Southerners after all. Got a couple of super simple, yummy dessert recipes from a niece.  At least, I heard they were yummy.  I didn't try any myself but dang it, I sure wanted to. Don't know if I can adapt them, but I'm hoping so.  We got back this evening and I'm too tired to hunt them up right now, so I'll post them later in the week.

Hope you all had at least half as good a time as I did!

Neighbors

Saturday morning brought tree service folks to the door, ready to clear my driveway and yard, as is their business. But it also brought neighbors to my door, neighbors with a chain saw, who came out of the goodness of their hearts.

Jack is unable to even walk in the snow, much less help, but I was able to throw on a jacket and help drag cut limbs and branches out of the way. We lost more limbs and another tree during the night, and as we live on the corner of the two main streets in the neighborhood, the debris was seriously impeding traffic, too.

One of the men said he watches us set up for Halloween every year, and that his children really enjoy coming here to Trick or Treat.  That made me feel good, as if maybe we are contributing to the community in a small way.

More neighbors were out looking around, taking pictures, and they helped drag branches for a while, too. There was a lot to move.

Yesterday I ran into another neighbor at the grocery store, who is also a night nurse at my hospital.  He said he'd seen the mess on the way home Saturday morning, and had planned to come over with his chainsaw once he woke up that afternoon, but by then it was all done. Many hands...

When I was out here searching for a house back in 2003, one of the selections was a beautiful home with a garden bath and sitting room off the master bedroom, and a kitchen to die for.  It sat back off the road, hidden by a wooded area, accessed only by a long, winding gravel driveway, and no other houses for several "city blocks".   We didn't take it because there was no carport or garage, and we couldn't have afforded to add one, at least not for several years. But I think about how this winter would have been if we'd bought that house, and I believe our guardian angel was looking out for us. 

These guys did this because we are a community, a neighborhood, and would have been insulted if I'd tried to pay them. But I'll bet they won't turn down a pan of Pioneer Woman's Apple Dumplings tonight.

Frozen--by Indecision

This has been my weekend off--the 3 days I was eagerly anticipating. I daydreamed of getting so much sewing done, working on paper crafts to send in letters to my girls. I planned to quickly pack up the rest of the Christmas decorations and use the dining room floor to lay out my daughter's string quilt and sandwich it. I was going to make cookies to take back to work Tues. night. I wanted to stitch up a quick table topper to give my neighbor in appreciation for her taking care of Tandi when J-Man was in the hospital.

Are you laughing yet?

Well, the weekend hasn't been a total loss.  I got in an extra nap, got the bathrooms cleaned, culled through some more quilt magazines, did some real cooking and not just re-heating pizza, though that was done, too. Christmas will get put away today.

But when I got into my sewing room and began poking around, I came across even more UFOs and baggied projects I'd fogotten I had.

A couple of years ago, when I was co-leader of our quilt bee, we played quilt bingo, from the Fons and Porter  Sept/Oct '06 magazine. I collected the blocks to put together some community quilts for us to donate, and then forgot about them.

Last night I found them, and was trying to figure out how to put them together. I decided black sashing would look the best (though the photo in the link shows red sashing and it looks good), but couldn't decide on the width or the layout. And, as usual when you have several people making blocks, they don't all measure out at 10 1/2". 

I was thinking on point would be more interesting than just squared (though it looks pretty good in her photo), and might disguise the uneven sizes. But what should I use for setting triangles if I use black sashing?  And I don't have enough black fabric anyway, so I got online and ordered some, because I've already checked our local quilt shop in the past and they rarely have solid blacks.  So I put that one away.

Pulled out the balloon blocks and decided to frame the blue squares with darker blue sashing and then just scatter the balloons over all.  Except--you got it--I didn't have enough blues in a shade that wouldn't clash with the cloud fabric. Found more at the Fat Quarter shop and ordered that with the blacks.  Put them away.

Found these:

Rejects from the Christmas sweatshirt vest made 2 years ago. I was thinking of maybe trimming the tree block back and making a small wall hanging, with little Christmas buttons or charms on it, but then again, maybe it and the holly leaves would look good on Christmas bags, which I didn't have the time nor the inclination to start. So I put those away.

Tucked under a bunch of other projects, I found these little blocks:

They had pieces of a brown sashing that had been trimmed down in preparation for cutting apart, so I got out the seam ripper and took off the rest of the sashing. I vaguely remember planning on using these in a swap 2 years ago, but they didn't make the grade.  Should I just stitch them together  and add a couple of borders for a Christmassy table topper? Or a runner? 

And did I really want to unpack the 2 suitcases of Christmas fabric to find something I could use?  Nope, it was too late at night.

I don't even remember making these blocks, much less what I was going to do with  them:

They're made from Christmas fabrics, but I don't think I like the varying widths of strings in such a small block.  It makes them look awkward, and I can't seem to find a layout I like.  If I made 1 more, I could just add sashing, which would minimize the awkwardness and, with the addition of a couple of borders, would have a respectable table topper for next Christmas.  But then, I'd have to unpack those 2 suitcases....

Okay, what about a table topper for my neighbor?  I found a cute little pattern at a LQS and thought I could pull from my overflowing scrap baskets to do it, but it takes 80 small 2" squares.  Not 2 1/2", which I already have bags full of, but 2".  I'd need to either cut new ones or trim the old ones. At this point, I threw up my hands and went to bed.

And, after dealing with 3 disoriented patients Thurs. night, 2 of whom required restraints, my back is still sore, so I haven't gotten down in the floor to sandwich DD's quilt.

So.  Nothing accomplished.  Does this happen to anyone else? 

Leaking Brain Cells

The good news is--Rose, my baby truck, is okay! After stopping by the auto repair shop on my way home from work this morning, I called our auto service to arrange for the truck to be towed to the mechanic's.  The lady asked if I'd tried to jump start her.  Well, no, just tried starting her up and stopped when she started making weird noises.

So when the tow truck got there about 9:30, he attached the jumper cables.  After about 3 false starts, she got her second wind and started right up!  Woohoo!  Way to go, Rose!

The driver advised me to let her run 30-45 minutes before turning her off.

Well, sure.  

Here's the disturbing news. I pulled up a couple more leftover Christmas decoration stakes out of the thawing ground, came in and answered the computer-generated call-back to assure them the tow truck came, changed into my nightgown and went to bed.

With the motor still running.

Woke up all of a sudden at 2:30 pm realizing what I'd done.  Five hours later.   Jumped up, ripped off the C-PAP, detoured by the bathroom, and dashed  stumbled into the living room, where my darling super-husband told me he'd realized the same thing about noon and went out to turn my car off. Which was a pretty good feat, considering there is still a small mounded barrier of ice-crusted snow blocking the gravel drive, and he has mobility problems. My hero!

Then he told me I could never say anything about his memory again. I promised.

Of course, I can't guarantee I will be able to remember that promise.


Now I have to go check my gas gauge.

Between Holidays

Christmas was great, and mostly none the worse for being celebrated on Saturday.  The tamales I ordered from New Mexico finally got here on Saturday--but were room temperature, so weren't safe to eat.  I have a bone to pick with both the US Post Office AND the New Mexico catalog.  They were shipped from NM on Mon. the 21, Priority Rush mail, but didn't arrive for 5 days??  What's that all about?  

So we only had green chile stew, because I don't really care about cooking anyway and didn't want to spend the whole day in the kitchen. And everyone was fine with that.  Not sure what we'll do for New Year's, as we don't have a tradition for that meal, but it's all okay.

I gave J-Man a Kindle, the new edition that will audibly read to him.  Having only one hand, sometimes it's hard to do something as simple as scratch your nose when you're trying to read a book.  He's also a bit dyslexic, and the adjustable font size and limited number of lines on a "page" make it easier to keep his place. Since we gave DD the first edition last Christmas, she's been able to help him figure it out, while learning about the new features. 

J-Man gave DD money on a Visa card to start a dining room set fund.  She has 2 chairs bought for her at a yard sale, and a drop leaf sofa table also bought at a yard sale, and that's it.  When she moved into her tiny one-bedroom apartment with no dining room and minimal kitchen, she got rid of lots of her furniture, as well as her artificial Christmas tree.  Now she has lots of space, but not much else, and is slowly buying the pieces she wants. This is the year of Gifts for the Home, as the catalogs put it.

I bought her 4 place settings of open stock Oneida flatware, and she's still trying to decide if she likes this pattern or wants to exchange it for another. I also put 4 cloth napkins in her stocking, each rolled up and tied with a small ribbon.  She pulled them out with a puzzled look on her face and asked why I was giving her fat quarters!  Only a quilter's daughter would make that mistake, right?

She bought me Jinny Beyer's book, Quiltmaking by Hand, which has been on my wish list for a couple of years, and J-Man got me a new watch (I love funky watches) and this.  I saw it on Rare Bird Finds and fell in love with it.  It's supposed to rain tomorrow, so I will get to try it out!

J-Man says he ordered the Supreme Slider for me, but it hasn't come in yet, and knowing his aptitude (or lack thereof) with the computer, we can't be sure he really did order it.  Guess I'll have to check the bank statement, as his email box is a mess.

Anyway, it's been a great few days, as I was off for 4 nights, but now have to go back to work for a couple of nights.  It's been nuts at work--in fact, they called me Sat. night to ask me to work extra--so I'm not looking forward to it at all.  DD doesn't leave until Saturday morning, which means we'll get to watch the ball drop together.  And I've gotten her hooked on Ghost Whisperer (evil grin), so we'll spend a few hours watching back episodes.  I did get to spend some time sewing yesterday, starting the borders on the string quilt I'm making her.  It felt good to crank up the Bernina again! It won't be finished before she leaves this time, but maybe within a couple of weeks.

All in all, it was a wonderful holiday season here in the NC mountains.  Hope you were able to make some beautiful memories with your loved ones!


P.S.  There is STILL snow on the ground!

Showing my Age

I have finally become my father.  Which isn't altogether a bad thing, but, well, you decide.

Last week I was at JC Penney, exchanging a few items.  As I left the store, I passed stacks of jeans with frayed seams, rips, and threadbare areas--old-looking jeans with new prices.  There are racks of jeans in better condition at Goodwill!  Heck, just buy twice as many at the local thrift store for the same amount of money, and rough them up a bit!  Am I out of the loop here?

Then one of our young nursing assistants was talking about a band he likes, named "P____(insert male body part here) Monkey." Said they had some good music. Now I don't like rap, or grunge (do they still do that?) or heavy metal, but there are some sounds out there I really like these days.  However, I told Eric I would never be able to discuss their music with him, because I refuse to listen to a band with that name.  He said I was judging a book by its cover.  I said anyone who willingly names their band something you wouldn't want to discuss with your grandmother is showing more of their character than a simple book cover.
Am I wrong?

Thirdly, Mighty Mom posted a challenge a couple of weeks ago to "show your greyness."  Well, here you are folks:

Unlike my father, who was bald long before his death at age 47, I have hair, white though it may be.

So.  Did I show my age?



PS.  I missed the flu shot from work last month due to J-Man's hospitalization, so now I've come down with a mild case of it.  Hope to answer your comments and visit all your blogs soon.  In the meantime, have a Happy Holiday week!

Uneventful Week

Not much is going on in Scrapsville--well, not much of interest.  There is always work, and always housework. I did get my first full paycheck since early September.  The bank account breathed a little sigh of relief.  I figured out, I only worked 4 days in October.  I was on call sometimes, and I took PDO, but only 4 shifts did I actually work. Except for the pay, I could get used to that!

Took the hammock down this week. Raked 17 bags of leaves--and there are at least 3 times that many still out there, but I ran out of bags.  Got most of the Halloween stuff packed away, but I need to buy another plastic bin.  I'm considering a small storage facility for the Halloween and Christmas bins, as well as the boxes of past tax information, the bedside commode we got, but never used, the artificial Christmas tree, and the boxes of milkglass I own, but have no place to display.  The garage is getting a little crowded.

Let's see: what else?  I took a couple of boxes to the vocational thrift shop to donate, exchanged some items I bought for the J-Man which were the wrong size, and dropped off a shoebox of toys at a local church for Samaritan's Purse.  I made up the box last year and missed the deadline, and would have missed it this year, too, except I heard it mentioned on the local radio station. I had every intention of making up a couple more, but didn't realize the deadline was so soon.

Oh, and took Tandi to the vet for routine bloodwork.  Since we are going up to DD's this Fri. (a 7.5-hr drive), I wanted something to settle her down.  She doesn't like riding in the car and she freaks out at rest stops with all the people and the noise.  He gave her something he calls "Doggy Prozac" that won't sedate her, but will ease her anxiety.  I hope it works. Our last dog loved car rides, but Tandi is so neurotic.  She's also about 5 pounds over what she weighed last year, so she and I started walking some.  We won't talk about my weight, except to laugh hysterically at the mere thought of a 5lb weight loss making a difference.

I finished one of my UFOs, but haven't taken a picture yet.  I need to do that and mark it off Finn's list.

BTW, I'm leaving the poll open until Monday night, so let me know how you feel about continuing the movie trivia game.  There have been only 4 votes so far, maybe because I haven't posted much lately and people haven't seen the poll.  If most all are in favor, I'll restart it next weekend.  What the heck, it's a holiday and a good time to watch movies--if you can outvote the football watchers, or find another TV!

Two Adults and a Dog

Well, DD left this morning and is home now, tossing limp vegetables out, mollifying the cats, and getting ready for work tomorrow.  She has been a gem, cooking for her dad, reading to him, and giving him his meds when I had to work and sleep.  We probably won't see her again until around Thanksgiving, or maybe Christmas.  She has suggested we think about moving closer to her, so she would be able to help more.  The thought surprised me, as I sometimes regress to her teens and early twenties, when she was so anxious to get out on her own, away from home and parental units. But she is an adult and I believe this summer, with first her own health issues and now her dad's, has changed all our perspectives.

J-Man's cousin Bill came up yesterday and left this morning.  He thought he'd be able to get a room here in town, if he stayed overnight, and I laughed when he suggested it. It's leaf-peeper season and rooms are hard to come by, especially on the weekend.  No matter.  We tossed the extra pillows off the sofa and threw on some queen-sized sheets and blankets, and he declared it more comfortable than his own couch, where he slept after coming down with some respiratory illness a couple of weeks ago. It's a long drive from his home to ours, about 5 1/2 hours, but it did hubby a world of good to have a member of his family around who wasn't pushing pills or needles or watching what he ate--and wasn't female!  We did a lot of laughing and the guys did a lot of reminiscing and we introduced Bill to the movie Sneakers. 

The house feels very empty with half its population gone. Tandi has had a great time playing with DD's dog, but she has spent the rest of the day snoozing on the back of the sofa, exhausted from the week, and happy to be back in her safe little routine with her human family all together again.

It all feels rather surreal right now; we're in our own home with usual bedtimes, thermostat control, and refrigerator access again, but things are not quite the same.  There's a stack of pharmacy receipts and paperwork on the dining room table, new medication times to learn, and these on the bathroom counter, waiting for an empty jug in which to be discarded:

That represents over $800.00 worth of medication injected into hubby's abdominal wall. Doesn't look like that much, does it? Tonight was his last injection until after the liver biopsy Tues. afternoon.

Tomorrow the carpet cleaner comes, followed by some salesman who will pitch a clean air system recitation that I will only halfway hear, in order to help a friend get a carpet shampooer. I wish I'd said no. There are MD appointments to be made, meals to be cooked, laundry to do, floors to be mopped and recorded programs to be watched, but really, we wait. And after Tuesday we wait again.  And through it all, we try not to speculate or worry.

The Waiting Game

I was supposed to work this weekend, but census was low, and I was able to just take call from J-Man's room.  My scrubs are hanging in the closet just in case, but I haven't been needed so far. It'll make for a slim paycheck, but hey, it's only money, right?

We are waiting for the boatload of test results to come back.  Every day, they draw more blood from his poor little veins to check his clotting time, his kidney panel and others, but the list of exotic tests remains unreported. Fri. afternoon, his heart rate soared into the 120s and his blood pressure began climbing, a result of abrupt but necessary withdrawal from his beta blockers when he was admitted. Our doc cautiously restarted a mild beta blocker and so far, his HR and BP are in the perfect range. In addition, his kidney labs have improved significantly, better than expected, so he has been started on a mild diuretic again.  Today I could identify his knuckles again.  He still has a lot of generalized swelling, but it's good to know his kidneys are tolerating this med.

I wish we could say the same for J-Man's liver. He is beginning to look a little yellow, as the liver test results get worse. The liver filters out ammonia from the blood, and when it begins to accumulate, a person gets more lethargic and confused.  Today his speech had been more slurred and his sentences somewhat disjointed, and it's a combination of sleep deprivation and an elevated ammonia level. We haven't had much sleep the last few nights--only 2-4 hours each night--and he is accustomed to 9-10 hours nightly.  But they can't give him a sleeping pill  because of his liver.

He's on a blood thinner for the clots in his leg, and they are having to keep a close watch on the labwork, because his platelet count is low, which means he already will bleed freely.  He has so many bruises from needle sticks, it looks as if he's been in a free-for-all. At some point they will have to stop the blood thinner for a day so he can undergo a liver biopsy without fear of bleeding out, but that isn't even on the schedule yet.  His CT scan on Saturday didn't shed much light, so he will undergo another one today.

We're hoping to get some kind of results today--something that can point us in the right direction. He's tired of being in the hospital, tired of being tired, but he is such a good sport.  DD has been wonderful, spelling me in the afternoons so I can go home to my C-PAP and get some sleep, and she brought her little dog, so Tandi hasn't been so lonely.  She was planning to go home today, but may stay a few more days, as she brought her laptop and can work remotely. Tomorrow, J-Man and I were supposed to meet up in Gatlinburg with my nursing school roommate whom I've not seen in 20 years.  We were excited to get to  spend the day together, but life has intervened once again.

And so we wait.  Thankfully, J-Man is sleeping tonight, rousing briefly when they come to take his blood pressure, and even able to return to sleep after laborious trips from the bed to the bathroom.  I don't know if it's just exhaustion, or the effects of the blood ammonia level that are allowing him to sleep, but at this point, I'll just be happy for him. 

As for me, well, when I can't get back to sleep, I have all your blogs to read and projects to drool over and sweet emails to answer.  If I don't leave a comment, please forgive me. I am making it by, but sometimes it's a few days later. Meanwhile, go hang a bat or a skeleton for me, okay?

Checking in

Hi, all,
Thanks for the good wishes and prayers.  Just a brief note to fill you in.  J-Man  is in acute renal failure and liver failure and they aren't sure why.  Some of the tests aren't showing anything definitive, and others can't be done because of wonky lab work.  In addition, they found multiple blood clots in his affected leg (the paralyzed side). 

It's all very complex and everyone is scratching his or her head about what to do.  At this point, not knowing the cause, all they can do is treat the symptoms, but he remains puffed up like a blowfish. If you took a pin to his feet and legs, he'd spurt fluid everywhere.  Hmmm, maybe I should suggest that....

But J-Man, being who he is, is in good spirits and usually has the staff chuckling before they leave the room.  He and I are light and dark that way. As he puts it, he feels fine, but everyone tells him he's sick! I am glad he's not uncomfortable.

In addition, he's in my hospital, with some of my friends taking care of him--and me, too, bless their hearts.  Since I work nights, there are many of the day therapists, staff, and various and sundry services I have never met or have only talked with over the phone. They don't know me, or that I'm a nurse, yet they treat him with compassion and patience and sincere good will. It makes me feel much more comfortable when I need to leave him, which isn't often.

DD is coming in tonight, so we are grateful for the long weekend, and her understanding co-workers. Her dad adores her, and I think she will feel better being able to see him for herself. My neighbor has allowed me to put Tandi in her fenced-in back yard so that Tandi doesn't have to spend hours and hours in her crate, and that has been wonderful.

We feel really blessed with family, friends, neighbors, and a wonderful staff of folks at the hospital, from the volunteers to housekeeping to ancillary services and the medical/nursing personnel. Though we have been on the other side of the chart more than once,  each time I swap places I take away a new perspective on my own job.

Saturday at the movies is cancelled for this week.  If we ever get to just watch the television in his room, I nod off anyway, and my brain is mush.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Hiatus

Gotta take a quick break from blogging--had to put J-Man in the hospital and will be staying there, with limited internet access. We just might have to skip the movie trivia bit this weekend--then again, I might see a couple I haven't seen before while in his room!

Back soon!

Challenges

Long, boring post ahead. Feel free to move on to happier blogs. I won't be offended. In fact, I might just do the same thing.



These days, my mental state is ragged and tired and ugly. I am hard to be around; I live in the negative. I didn't want that to show through online, so blogging has been very sparse this last month. What posts there have been were shallow and space-fillers. Is that fair? Is it better to try to smooth over the rough spots and keep things as light and cheerful as possible or is it a better thing to be honest about your state of mind? Maybe the correct answer is somewhere in-between. Moderation in all things.

Autumn has always been a time of renewal for me. The crispness of its air and the vibrancy of its colors always seem to smooth my rough edges, even as I get wild and crazy about Halloween. I need that right now; it's been a rocky summer.

There have been concerns about my daughter's physical and emotional health, and J-Man, due to his partial paralysis, has seemed to endure more falls than usual. (The stroke, by the way, was 30 years ago this Labor Day Weekend.) A change in management has resulted in a lot of mistrust, a HUGE turnover in staff, and a persistent cloud over the unit. I have been looking for other employment, but in this small area, nursing jobs for which I am qualified and in which I have at least a passing interest, are not in abundance. Moving from one lousy situation into an equally lousy, and unknown, situation isn't the answer. Limbo (4. a place or state of imprisonment or confinement) isn't a great place to reside. (My current address is 911 Limbo Lane, Indecision Island, thank you very much.)

So changes must be in order: changes in attitude? viewpoint? place of work? priorities? management? Nah, that's not gonna happen.

A change of attitude is my best bet, with priorities a close second. What's that saying? If you can't change a situation, you need to change your attitude about the situation?

Here's to hot apple cider, crunchy leaves and mellow golden-lit days. They can't come too soon.

Blogging Sahara

Sheesh! Y'all must have thought I'd fallen off the Blue Ridge Parkway or been attacked by slugs. Actually, except for work (which has been physically and emotionally exhausting this week), there's not much been going on in Scrapsville.

The slugs won the war in the garden. I have 2 tomato plants still standing and beginning to produce, one very small jalapeno pepper plant with a tiny jalapeno, and one bell pepper plant with a small green pepper on it. The squash plants were losing the battle, so I sacrificed them to the slugs to protect the tomato plants.

My daughter turned me on to a podcast "You Bet Your Garden", which has greatly increased my pathetic knowledge base. His recommendations for slugs: Lay a board in the middle of the garden. The slugs will all congregate under it in the heat of the day, and you can just lift the board, gather all those slimy produce thieves and drop them in a jar of soapy water. How simple is that?

The pet fur actually worked for the bigger slugs--they wouldn't cross it--but the tiny ones managed to find the bare spots around the stem and crawl up.

The other thing I learned? Wood mulch is not something you want to use around your plants and in your garden. It encourages slugs and moles and voles. What did I put in my yard this year? At least 30 bags of cedar mulch, both in the garden and around my flowers. And there are mole tunnels leading to the base of one decimated bachelor button plant and one nearly dead sweet william.

I need to have two oak trees taken down, as they are dead or nearly dead, and if there was no disease or infestation in them, I had planned to have them chipped up for mulch. Not sure I'm going to do that now.

The deck garden has done beautifully, though. On the to-do list for today is making pesto, to use up those basil leaves while they're still in good shape. And 2 pepper plants I didn't have room for in the lasagna garden were placed in small pots; lo and behold, there are 2 peppers on them. Other herbs will be cut back a little and hung to dry in the closet: oregano, chives, rosemary.

Then maybe a little hand sewing in the evening. I took the yarn hair off the two Handy Dolls, because it was shedding, and attached the doll hair Jean sent me to one of the dolls and it looks so much better. As soon as I get a few more made up, I'll post a picture.

So that's the scoop in the land of Scraps today.
What's on your to-do list?

Strays

Julie, from Through the Barn Door, is dealing with damages left from a "temporary" tenant in her guest house. That's her story, so I won't go into details, but an email exchange with her brought to mind all the folks who have lived with us over the years.

Abandoned by his parents, J-Man was raised by an aunt and uncle, until the uncle became so abusive, J-Man feared for his life. Friends took him in and he lived in their basement apartment for a while. He's always had a soft spot for people with nowhere to go. As a result, lots of friends and relatives over the years have lived with us for one reason or another. Some stories have ended well, some have not.

Shortly after J-Man and I got married, my 17-year-old brother was planning to leave home. He and my dad never did have a very good relationship, so J-Man and I invited him to live with us for several months, hoping things would blow over. All it did was cause a rift between my dad and me, and still my brother would sneak out the bedroom window at night. After several months, he decided living with us was no better than living at home, so he moved to the YMCA, which advanced his life lessons considerably. My dad forgave us, and though their relationship was still bumpy, he and my brother were on speaking terms again. I'm happy to say my brother married a great gal and fathered 3 boys of his own. I'm sure my dad is chuckling from his grave over that one.

J-Man's best friend also lived with us part of that time, sleeping on the living room sofa. It was only supposed to be a week or so, but I think he was there at least 3 months. Since he was the pianist where J-Man was the choir director, and we lived right behind the church, he found it very convenient, staying with us. Eventually, though, Jerry moved out and moved on. We heard from him less and less often, which is sometimes how it goes with college friends. About a year ago, we learned he'd had a heart transplant--and didn't survive. We hated to hear that. I always liked Jerry. He and his girlfriend were responsible for locating a Cabbage Patch Doll for DD's 6th Christmas, at a time when you couldn't get one for love or money. I think she still has that doll.

Then J-Man's sister came for a visit with her two kids and "decided" (after she got here) to leave her husband. He got mad, came from 4 states away to stand in the yard with a gun and threaten us all, and then they made up and ALL of them lived with us several more weeks. Later on, after her husband died, we took her and the kids (now teenagers and with a pre-school niece) and rented a big house that had been for sale for a couple of years. We combined incomes to pay the rent, tried to help her get back on her feet, drew up a budget for her, and paid off some of the rubber checks she had strewn around town. That lasted about 3 months, at which time she and the kids got tired of the financial restrictions and moved back in with her stepdad, leaving us responsible for a huge monthly rent and repairs for damaged property.

A couple of years afterwards, she and the kids got a big settlement for the husband's untimely death, and blew through it all in less than a year. Her son got in with the wrong crowd, got hold of some crack cocaine laced with household cleaner, and died a horrible death. The last we heard, his sister and her daughter were living in an apartment with no furniture, struggling to get by, but angy at us for not letting them have one of our cars. Some people are slow learners.

For a while, one of J-Man's brothers lived with us. He was a divorced dad, with custody of his daughter for the summer. It was nothing for him to disappear for a few days, leaving his daughter in our care. I never forgave him for taking off while we were on vacation and leaving our dog without food or water. She managed to get out of the fence and went searching for us, and was hit by a car. At last count, he was living in California somewhere, close to his daughter. I hope he spent more time with her.

In the late '90s, DD, ever her father's daughter, persuaded us to take in a friend for a few weeks til he could get on his feet financially, maybe get a second-hand car, and go to school. He stayed a year, bought himself a Sony PlayStation, DVD player, and other electronics, and skipped classes at the community college even when we drove him there. DD gave him grief for his attitude and behavior and finally kicked him out herself. She recently heard he has apparently mended his ways and is in law enforcement now. What a happy surprise.

So this is the kind of guy I married, a sweetheart with a penchant for taking in "strays". Right now, the only stray living with us has 4 legs.

Who knows if that will change? Or when? I just hope J-Man never does.

Catching up

After a beautiful weekend, we're supposed to have cooler temps and possibly a shower or two before it heats up to the mid 70s this weekend. On the one hand, I've been itching to get out and work in the yard, but on the other hand, I still tire very easily, and the inhaler is still kicking sleep to the curb. Only 3 more days of it, thank goodness. I go back to work tonight, and I'm really dreading it.

Saturday the local birds elected a spokesperson to remind me the feeders were empty. What a racket! Some little guy was out there just a-pounding on the wooden feeder. It's a wonder he didn't break his little beak. So Tandi and I took the bin of birdseed out and filled all four feeders. Poor things! With all the rain, some of those seeds had actually sprouted in the feeders, and I scraped 2" tall greens out of a couple of them. Word must have spread throughout the neighborhood, because Sunday afternoon, here's what was going on outside my sewing room window:

Isn't that one gorgeous tail?


Without the tail, though, he looks like a white rat.


He caught a glimpse of me through the window just before I banged on it to scare him away. I don't mind feeding the squirrels, but I don't want them at the feeder, so I toss their food out into the yard. Guess this little guy was particularly hungry.

Have you been following the Bloggers' Quilt Festival over at Amy's place? There are over 430 entries so far, and I've only managed to get through about 75 of them! Where did everyone come from? So many different styles and skill levels--it's a real feast for the eyes! I can tell I'll be checking these out for at least the next week or so!
Sewing here has been very scant--just too lethargic to get much done. Jacqui has challenged everyone to "Spring to Finish" all those UFOs and WIPs in our sewing rooms--there's still time if you want to hop on over and check it out. Maybe next week I'll have a finish to show.